8 Ways On How to Deal with Passive Aggressiveness in a Relationship
Passive aggressiveness is a difficult thing to deal with in a relationship. There are so many different ways that passive aggressiveness can be exhibited, and it is just as frustrating for both parties when the other person does not even realize that they are being passive aggressive! This article has been written with the intention of providing you with some useful ways on how to deal with passive aggressiveness in a relationship.
1. Understand what's behind the behavior
Passive aggressiveness is a lot like a game of chess. You know what you're supposed to do, but you can't win unless you figure out how to get the other person to cooperate with your plan.
This is where understanding what's behind their behavior comes into play. You may think that they're just being difficult, but there's usually more going on than just that—and it's up to you to figure out what it is and how to address it.
For example, maybe they're frustrated because they feel like they aren't being listened to or taken seriously enough. Maybe they want more attention from you but don't know how to ask for it in a non-threatening way. Or maybe they feel like their requests aren't being met because something else has been going on in your relationship that makes it hard for them to trust you right now.
The point is that passive aggressiveness isn't always about getting back at someone or trying to make them feel bad. It can also be a sign of fear or insecurity. It's important not only that we understand why our partner might be behaving this way toward us (which will allow us to respond appropriately), but also so we can understand ourselves better as well. This is because we might never know what we did wrong that pushes them to act or feel that way.
2. Set limits
First and foremost, you need to set limits on your partner's behavior. If you're the one being passive-aggressive, only someone who is willing to stand up for themselves will put a stop to it.
That’s why, you should set a limit with your partner that they need to tell you what they want so that they don't have to “act out” or be manipulative in order to get their needs met. You may have to go through some trial and error before you find a way for them to communicate clearly without getting angry or hurtful about it (which is normal).
More importantly, setting limits means telling your partner what you will and won't accept from him or her. You might decide that you don't want your partner yelling at you or criticizing you in front of others. Or maybe you've had enough of being ignored by your partner when they feel like they’re not getting what they want. That’s why setting limits is about saying what's acceptable and what isn't as well.
3. Address the issue as soon as possible
By addressing the issue right away, you can try to solve any issues that have arisen so far and prevent them from happening again in the future.
Another benefit of addressing this issue early on is that it helps keep the relationship healthy and strong. If you let things slip under the rug for too long, it can lead to resentment and conflict later on down the line. Worst,is that the longer you wait to address an issue, the harder it will be for you to repair your relationship. So if you don't address it when it first comes up, it's likely that your partner will become more and more bitter over time.
With this, if you're trying to deal with passive aggressiveness in your relationship—or if you want to prevent passive aggressiveness from ever entering into your relationship—make sure that addressing these issues early on is part of your plan!
4. Recognize the pattern
Passive-aggressive relationships often have repeating patterns—for example, perhaps your partner always gets upset when he or she does something wrong and then refuses to talk about it until later. Acknowledge that this is happening, and let them know it's happening so they can stop doing it or at least improve their communication skills around it.
Once you've identified this pattern, it's time to figure out what to do about it! It may seem hard and challenging at first but once you have a plan, you will not be manipulated once again by your partner and hopefully your plan is effective.
5. Communicate
Communication is the best way to deal with passive aggressiveness because it allows both parties to express their feelings, needs, and wants without fear of judgment or retaliation. The best communication strategies are those that are open-ended and allow both parties time to speak their mind without interruption or distraction from outside stimuli.
Thus, when you’re in a relationship where passive aggressiveness exists, you need to have honest communication with your partner. This is because communication can help you understand where they're coming from, and it can help them understand where YOU are coming from. It's important to remember that communication isn't just about talking—it's also about listening! When you listen carefully, you're showing respect for your partner's opinions and feelings, which helps build trust and closeness between two people who love each other very much but also sometimes want different things out of life.
6. Remember that it is not your fault
First of all, remember that it's not your fault. Passive aggressive people are often emotionally immature, meaning they don't know how to express their feelings in an appropriate way. They may be afraid of confrontation or conflict, so they use passive aggression instead of open communication. This makes them feel safer because they don't have to deal with their anger directly — but it also makes them feel guilty and confused when they hurt others without meaning to do so.
Remembering that it's not your fault can help you avoid getting caught up in your partner's bad behavior by taking responsibility for it yourself. Don't get sucked into arguments about who started the fight or whose fault it was — just recognize that this is a pattern for him or her, not for you personally.
7. Be patient
Patience is one of the most useful ways on how to deal with passive aggressiveness in a relationship. When you're dealing with someone who is passive aggressive, it can be tempting to lash out and tell them exactly what you think. But if you don't have time for that kind of confrontation and drama, try being patient instead.
When you're dealing with a passive-aggressive person, it's important not to take their behavior personally. Remember that this person probably doesn't even realize they're being passive aggressive. They just want things done their way and don't know how else to ask for them. So when they push and prod at your patience, resist the urge to snap back at them or try to change their mind—instead, let it go and wait until they're ready to talk again.
8. Help them to confront what they're angry about
One way to deal with passive aggressiveness is to help your partner confront what they're angry about. When we're angry, we tend to avoid dealing with our feelings directly—we might lash out at others or make snide remarks instead of owning up to our anger or frustration.
By helping them confront their feelings, you can help them learn how to deal with them in a more constructive way. This will ultimately strengthen your relationship because it shows that you care about your partner's well-being and want them to be happy!
In a relationship, passive aggressiveness is one of the most serious red flags that indicate the impending breakup or divorce. However, if dealt with properly, it can be taken care of and managed to prevent any such misfortune from taking place. So the next time the passive aggressiveness starts to tear your relationship apart, try some of these suggestions to quell the tide before you two end up pulling each other's hair out.
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